American Politics for Dummies- A Guide to Pre-hysterical Legislation in the U.S.


(1) Any fool can interpret the Constitution, but not all fools can read it!

                    Source: Most recent U.S. Supreme Court rulings!

(2) Elected officials and legislators are not qualified to write laws, but, unfortunately, neither is anyone else.

                    Source: (a) The Civil Rights Act dictating whom one must serve in his own place of business.  Instead, the law should have prohibited the owner from using any public service, utility or public road that the victims of his bigotry help to support!

                                   (b) Most recent U.S. Supreme Court rulings!

                                   (c) The U.S. Supreme Court writing new law in “Citizens United” permitting unlimited bribery of public officials through unlimited and anonymous campaign donations!

(3) One can obtain anything one wants from the FDA for twenty dollars and oral sex.  In cases of hardship, they will generously wave the twenty dollars.

                    Source:  (a) Hundreds of drug prices drastically increased by pharmaceutical companies in anticipation of Affordable Care Act freezes on prices.

                                   (b) Pharmaceutical companies still permitted to pay generic companies bribes to withhold the lower priced generics from the market for as long as possible

(4) What do you call a legislator who votes to pass a “Stand Your Ground Law,” fully aware that innocent victims will be killed?  Answer: An “accessory before the fact” to negligent homicide and depraved indifference!

                       Source:  (a) Trayvon Martin’s needless homicide by the borderline mentally deficient George Zimmerman.

                                      (b)  Execution of innocent teenager by the enraged Michael Dunn, knowing he could use the law to legally kill.

                                      (c)  Execution of moviegoer in theater, whose murderer claimed he was in fear of his life because of all the popcorn thrown at him!

(5)  What do most of these legislators have in common?  Answer:  They proclaim themselves “Christians” as Jesus calmly partakes of another Alka Seltzer!

(6)  What else do they have in common?  Answer:  They are all getting paid by some other entity, even worse than they are to vote for anything that will sell more guns, enriching the legislator’s benefactors.

(7)  What do you call a U.S. Attorney General who takes no legal action against these legislators, especially those who are now allowing acknowledged criminals to use “Stand Your Ground Laws” to execute their victims?  Answer:  “Uncle Tom Holder!”

(8)  What do you call a president who is afraid to fire an “Uncle Tom Holder” and appoint a real attorney general?  Answer:  I’ll leave that up to the reader in deference to the presidency.

(9)  What do Supreme Court “Justices” who believe a defendant is not only innocent, but believe he was framed, yet allow him to be executed anyway, call themselves?  Answer:  “Justices” Roberts, Scalia, Kennedy, Alito, and Thomas all call themselves “Christians!” (Jesus, you can take another Alka Seltzer; this one’s on me!)

(10)  What is the proper term (without using obscenity) for Supreme Court “Justices” who believe it is Constitutional to knowingly execute innocent defendants, even those who are framed by prosecutors and police?  Answer:  See Point (1) above

(BONUS)  If, according to the same Supreme Court “Justices” who coincidentally believe that it is moral and Constitutional to execute innocent defendants, political donations are somehow protected by the first amendment as “an expression of opinion,” then why on earth is voting, the ultimate “expression of opinion” in a democracy, not protected as well????????   Answer:  I respectfully refer the reader to Point (1), this time including many “Constitutional Lawyers” (Too often an oxymoron, Mr. Obama?)


Allen Finkelstein (O’Finky), 3/21/14